It is a disservice to our children to not “fight fair” in front of them. Children can feel when the energy is not quite right. They can sense when mom is upset with daddy, again, or when tension is high between their caregivers or when they hear doors being slammed or they are asked, with a look 👀, to tread lightly.
We can take these opportunities to empower our children with tools to approach disagreements with confidence + clarity. They don’t have to fear conflict, they don’t have to run or numb or explode. They don’t have to cave when they aren’t liked or if their opinion isn’t the popular one. They can utilize tools that help them communicate their feelings, welcome feedback, and navigate this tension. It takes practice.
It starts with us. Our modeling is how they “learn.” I shared a video in my last post, go take a look at the tips there.