My outside relationships are a reflection of my inside one. How I treat myself, is how I will treat my partner, my children, my coworkers, my friends.
I notice when I start slipping on my own inner work, that I become highly critical of those I love. Like, no one can do anything right. Whenever this happens, I know I have to take some time to look inward.
Why am I so hard on myself? Whose voice is it I am hearing, anyway? This is the power of early childhood conditioning. We all carry limiting beliefs… scripts that describe who we are and what life is.
When I became a parent, I felt like I was doing “okay” in my healing journey. But children have a way of uncovering the unhealed wounds laying dormant. How I felt about myself, was showing up in how I was mothering my child. I was repeating the same behaviors that those before me did.
It is easy to blame others for what I lack. For a long time, I was in reactionary survival mode; lashing out because my child’s behavior scared or confused me; my rages turned to demands for her respect and compliance, I used punishment and criticism to get what I needed out of her.
We had to talk, act and look the part, because inside, I knew I did not. I would be fine fine fine, until I couldn’t breathe then BAM, explosion again. The days after would be filled with heavy shame. The cycle would continue.
At this time I was beginning my own inner child work, but to have an ACTUAL child to care for at the same time made it nearly impossible to do both, care for me, AND care for them…or so I thought.
This is why I created the Breaking Free Journal. This is the resource I use to be sure I am working on the inside stuff, while ALSO tending to my real children.
No longer do I blame them or depend on them for my healing. No longer do I worry I will pass this unhealed stuff down onto them. It ends with me. I can heal, so they don’t have to.
To get your free copy, sign up through the link Breaking Free Journal link in my bio.
