We teach teens about finance and about sex/drugs and about algebra but we don’t teach them how to navigate relationships. We don’t stand before them and reveal to them just how powerful their first relationships are. We don’t point out how patterns repeat themselves, or just how impactful caregivers can be and how their words/actions often teach us how to live and love ourselves and others.
So kids turn into adults that have sex and do drugs and over spend because they are afraid of their emotions. They don’t know how to communicate or set limits. They don’t know how to manage rejection. They work to earn love because they don’t believe they are enough. They armor up or over share, their words, their bodies, their gifts. They hide, and slowly detach from their true selves.
These kids have kids and the cycle continues. People pleasing. Shrinking. Performing. Pretending. Numbing.
If you’ve never explored the attachment styles, please do. I have a whole IGTV series specifically on this topic. And High school should have a boundaries 101 class offered.
How did you feel as a teen navigating your feelings?