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Courtney J. Burg

Courtney J. Burg

writer, speaker, and teacher

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What If They’re Just Scared?

Courtney J. Burg, Writer + Mentor
April 10, 2020


what-if-they're-just-scared.jpg

I ran into a young clerk yesterday who was very irritated. She snapped at me for using the bathroom that was apparently “closed.” I must have missed the sign as I rushed by to pee #pregnancybladder.

I stopped a moment and took a breath. A few years ago I would have taken over the conversation. I would have laid into her in some aggressive reactionary way + dominated her into a shame corner. But now, I’m grateful for a different approach. That’s what healing + observation has granted me.

In just a moment I was able to look at her + consider… what if she’s just scared? I smiled. I apologized. I asked her how her day was going. I thanked her for her help. The moment took a totally different turn. We were able to connect, even just briefly.

So many people are angry. Irritated. Annoyed. Overwhelmed. So many people are saying + doing things they wouldn’t normally, because they’re under unusual pressure at home + at work (if they’re working at all).

I’m not saying we excuse abusive behavior right now. I’m not saying everyone gets a free *jerk* pass. I’m just saying that maybe if we took a moment to step back, it would soften the experience for us all. We don’t need to fight fire with fire right now. Let’s just assume that everyone can’t always present as their best selves, and that’s okay. Grace goes a long way in this mess. For you, and for them. ❤️

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About the Author

Courtney J. Burg

Mama of four. Writer. Saved by Jesus, boundaries + dry shampoo. ✨ Reminding women of their worth.

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