I was asked yesterday “where’s the balance?”
I don’t think there’s a “balance” when keeping your child safe + whole. I do think there are topics that are simply OFF THE TABLE. I call these non negotiables. We all have them.
For me, I never force my kid to eat so that they get a treat later. I may ask them to try one more bite or remind them that we won’t have anymore dinner available after so to be “sure your belly is full for the night.” I trust that they are full when they say they are.
I don’t allow anyone to hug or hold or grab or tickle them without their permission. I know their looks and I know their voices. When either change even slightly, I step in.
But some stuff I’m flexible on. With four children now, our babies often skip naps on special occasions. We know this makes for a longer night on our end because over tired babies don’t sleep well🤣. However we also drive two cars in case I need to get the babies home earlier. I also don’t stress the manners stuff. My kids are polite. They are kind. I trust that they won’t be a jerk as an adult because my husband and I model appreciation and gratitude daily. They usually say “please” and “thank you” without being reminded.
To me it’s about tone and delivery from others… I never allow them to be manipulated or guilted or coaxed into saying or doing anything. If so, again I’ll step in. I speak up for them until they are able to do it for themselves.
What are your questions?? Type them here so I can clarify if needed. I want you to feel empowered this holiday season. Advocating for your child takes practice, but is SO IMPORTANT in keeping them feeling safe, confident + seen. My trust becomes their trust in themselves. It’s crucial we remind our kids that they are allowed limits too.
Courses on Boundaries, Heal from Codependency, Stewardship, and Rising Daughters are all available immediately for access to every active DYW member. Not only do you receive the self-paced video courses, but you get access to a monthly masterclass (including all the previous ones), bonus content, and email support with me.
Don’t wait… Join us today!
Now is the time to Discover Your Worth.
