Our society rewards productivity. We learn to crave it. But I’m learning more + more that this is extremely deceptive + harmful. Problem is, we don’t quite know what to do with ourselves when the slowness creeps in. Are we even worthy of rest we ask? No. We avoid + cringe. Going non stop is easier, even if it kills us.
We grab at more responsibilities.
We clean that drawer out.
We help a friend.
We start another business endeavor.
We go + go + go.
What is wrong with all of that? Nothing. Until we lose ourselves in the noise. Our body begins to break down. We feel exhausted, resentful, irritable. But it’s better than restlessness + boredom. Because quiet reminds us of the inward stuff we aren’t quite ready to face. So we don’t.
Our bodies respond to threats by entering a survival mode. Once the threat is gone, we are built to regulate + return to a calm state. Our parasympathetic nervous system aids in lowering our heart rate, kick starting digestion, and begins to assess the repairs needed for recovery within the body. Unfortunately, many of us are addicted to the survival mode feeling (the high) and never fully recover. Instead, when the quiet or calm comes near, we search for ways to create a threat. We like the race, the surge, the intensity. In other words, we are using a primal survival skill AGAINST ourselves. The bar is set higher each time, so we must add more + more + more to get that hit. We know burn out is on the horizon, as we can’t be “on” forever, yet we still push the threshold because we are now hooked.
It’s a major distraction.
It’s the biggest mask for modern addiction in my opinion. We can never fully respond in alignment with our true self in survival mode. Here, we miss the beauty. The stillness. The joy. It’s flying by too fast. Most of it self induced. To get off the ride, one must first become aware they are even on it.
Then, we can choose another way.