We teach our children how to say “no” but we don’t teach them to slow down. We forget that it’s also important to honor that whisper that says,
not right now,
not like this.
When someone likes us, pursues us, or longs to spend time with us, it feels good. We like to feel good, even if it means abandoning ourselves or our responsibilities. We immediately step into the role of 👉🏼 we must, because.
Here we slip away. We disappear into new relationships without asking many questions or taking our time. We follow that feel good feeling we first got, and wonder why it slowly dissipates. We feel sad as it does. After all, we gave it our everything, but we also lost ourselves.
Its possible to learn how to stay connected to your true self, your values, and your priorities while also engaging in new relationships. There is a sweet spot. As you heal, you’ll learn that saying “yes” to everything that feels good initially most likely isn’t the path to your highest self, but instead the path to the quickest self betrayal. You no longer need to feed your abandonment wound. It’s okay to step away from the chase.