I use to love the chase. The more they were unavailable, unstable, chaotic, dismissive, emotionally distant, unpredictable— the better. When they couldn’t fulfill me, I thought I was to blame. So I
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Archives for December 2020
Change doesn’t come through self pity
I never succeeded with a long term change when I hated myself. I never got sober because I was embarrassed or punished. I never started working out or eating well because of someone’s rude remarks
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I don’t have to decide right now
You’re on your own timeline, friends. Your pace is just that, yours. 🤍
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Don’t share what’s said in confidence
If friends have stopped confiding in you, this may be why. Safe people are those who can honor confidentiality, express firm boundaries dripping with grace, and know deep inside the shortcomings you
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Setting boundaries on ourselves
It’s not easy adjusting our sails. We see the direction we want to go, but often we aren’t willing to unload some heavy cargo. We fight it. We question ourselves. We wait. We see if with more time,
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Saying “No” can sound like…
Saying “no” can feel unnatural to so many, but it is the first boundary I always suggest practicing. It isn’t lost on me how scary + intimidating it can be to do this work. We fear hurting others, we
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Respecting the boundaries of others
As you progress in the work of boundaries, you’ll find your groove + voice. You’ll begin to feel more confident, safe + free. However there is a piece that I find we don’t talk about as much as we
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Love is Boundless
We want to love others. We want to help, we want to serve, we want to give away hope + forgiveness + meaning + value + worth.
But through our efforts we become exhausted. We grow bitter and resentful
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The old way
Have you ever heard this story? A woman was preparing Christmas dinner, and as she pulled the ham out of the oven, her daughter asked, “mom, why are the ends cut off the ham?” Her mother shrugged and
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